Cali

So here's the thing.
I'm in that stage in my life where I don't really know which way is up. I'm 20 years old. I don't want to be an adult yet but I'm not allowed to keep being a kid. Growing up is inevitable, I understand that. So I have a plan. I'm going to finish college. I need to, there's no other option. I need to take the next two years, hopefully no more than that, and get a degree in English or whatever and just have that done. But then, after that, I have the real thing I want. I want to move to California.
I want to gather all my friends that are willing to join me, hop in a car, and just fucking drive all the way to Cali. I'm thinking Ocean Beach/ San Diego area. I want to spend one year, just one year, doing whatever I want to do. Key thing being what I want. Sure no one pressured me into college, but I knew it had to be done. Society told me so. I have been on a timeline my entire life and I'm sick and fucking tired of it.
I'm willing to work through the next couple years, even if I'm unhappy at times. I can handle it. Because I know waiting at the end of it all, like a glowing white light, will be San Diego. Where I can live in warm weather, near the ocean, and write and write and write and make art and see music and eat delicious food and smile and experience things. I want all of it. I feel like the life I'm really supposed to have is out there waiting for me to just reach out and grab it. And it's on the west coast. I just know it. So, to make myself feel better, I'm going to make a list of the things that need to be done. I'm serious about this, and I don't want it slipping out of my grasp due to some minor detail I overlooked.

• First things first, I want to get in shape. People in California are beautiful, like all the people. So I want to feel beautiful too.
  
• Start my 'California Fund'. I already took a little money from this paycheck. This one will be tough because my checks are pretty small but it will be worth it.
  
• Figure out everything I'll need and how I'll get it. I.E., whether or not I'll need a car, which areas are best to live in, what the job situation is like there. I want to be prepared.
  
• Stay focused on school to ensure I graduate on time.
• Buy a map of California and pin it to my wall to remind me what I'm working toward.

Normally I would think a plan like this one to be childish and naive. But when I went to California this summer I loved it. I could completely see myself building a life there. Maybe it'll take me a couple years to get there, maybe more. I'll wait for the timing to be right. But I will make this happen. I want this for myself. It's going to be beautiful.