SO DAMN TORN

I am really really struggling with this decision on what to do next year. Two months ago I was so enthusiastic about the idea of getting an apartment with my friends in such a fun city, but now I feel so out of the loop. I feel like the plans they're making are for them, and it really doesn't matter one way or the other what I decide to do. I love them to death, but the closeness I have with them doesn't even compare to what they share with each other. I'm afraid that if I don't go, they will become even closer and I'll lose touch with them and that would be awful, it would be detrimental to my life. On the other hand, if I go and things continue the way they've been going as far as the three of us I will feel alone anyway.
This is probably the hardest choice I've made. If I stay in Lansing for another year I'll feel like I'm missing out on the experience of living the college party life and living with two of the best people I know. If I go to Kalamazoo I could regret it and I would be signed into that lease, of about $400 per month, for twelve months. I am so fucking confused and mad at myself for being so confused.
Maybe the fact that I'm struggling so much with whether to go up there or not means I shouldn't go, but I'm struggling just as much with the idea of staying at home. I feel like I want to cry. I have no idea what to do and I only have a few hours to make up my mind. What if I'm passing up the best year of my life? Or what if I'm making a huge mistake that will cost my thousands of dollars and basically a year of feeling left out? What the fuck does one do in this situation? Seriously, what the hell should I do? BECAUSE I'M FUCKING LOST.