Those Were the Days

What ever happened to the way I used to live? I feel that every part of life has a certain feeling to it, a certain vibe that covers everday activities and sums up the way in which your life is being conducted. A year ago that vibe started going from relaxed and happy to feeling edgy and spending days doing boring things.

My theory is that this started happening when I began spending less time with my close friends. The transition started slowly, I think the first step was when two of my friends became much closer. Which is great thing, don't get me wrong, but that's where this new stage began without a doubt. Then I left for school and drifted further from the things I had come to rely on to feel better. I felt stranded and was grasping to the things I used to love as a last ditch attempt at resuscitating my social life. It came to be that instead of doing things like going to the store together to wander around or taking walks or going on fast food runs for chicken nuggets, that our only point of contact was when we went to a party. The only social interaction was when we were drinking or smoking.

This has bled into the present. Where I now have job and a schedule for classes that gaurantees me no real social life. My two friends that became close over the summer are now like family. I don't mean to sound whiny or ungrateful, I'm just unhappy with the feeling my life has right now.

Whereas a few months ago I was sure I could do anything I wanted with the next year I now feel that I am stuck here because I don't have the monetary means to move nor do I have someone who would want to accompany me, and I'm sure living alone in another state would be just as depressing as living alone here.

So there's my two cents about the path my life has taken recently. I can only hope that things will start to look up and that I will have some kind of brilliant reawakening that brightens the things to come.